It's all about the relationship...

Thursday

I honored the relationship with my horse today. It felt really good to finally make things right for Josie. It made me sorry for the way that I have handled things the past few days, but they always say that you learn the best lessons from the mistakes that you make. So in that regard, I am grateful for the journey that I have experienced thus far.

When we got to the pens this morning, Mia and Kristen took off towards the Enchanted Forest. Josie and I followed, but we played the “it’s really uncomfortable to be near Mia” game. Basically, if we were going towards Mia, then she had to do all sorts of stuff. Sideways, backwards, falling leaf, traveling circle. You get the idea! If we walked away from Mia, we just walked in a straight line. Straight lines are way easier than all of that other rigmarole! After a while, I think that Josie started to get the game. The only rest came when we were moving away from her object of desire. Then Mia went over the bridge, which Josie hasn’t felt comfortable going over yet.

We stayed on the other side of the bridge and hung out and grazed for a while. Josie was slightly tense, since Mia was getting farther away. Eventually, Josie offered to go across the stream, so we went over to the other side. Of course she wanted to go towards Mia and Vegas, who were playing in the honeycomb. So we did a traveling circling game at the canter towards the honeycomb. She got very emotional, but I did not. That is HUGE for me. I have somehow made a very important mental and emotional switch this week. I am able to keep a calm focused energy in the face of her mental breakdowns, and not get all emotional about it. We played with approach and retreat again, and then we had to go back to the pens to get to class. It was definitely a provocative, emotional session for her, and I wasn’t sure if it was going to be a good breakthrough for her, or if I was just feeding the fire that had been smoldering all week.

When we went back to play later that day, she was happy to meet me at the gate of her pen. That is always a good feeling! I had a nice grooming session (since she had rolled after her sweaty emotional morning…). When I went to leave the pen, I decided that everything was going to be on her terms. If we made it out to our afternoon focus session, that was great. If not, then that was great too. I had NO agenda. Surprisingly, even though she was happy to be haltered, and relaxed in her pen, she did not want to leave the pen. I was determined to wait her out until she was ready. She ventured out at one point, but then went right back in her pen. She kept yawning and licking her lips, which is usually a sign of adrenaline. How interesting. Eventually she was ready to come out (partially influenced by Mia leaving her pen, but hey—I’ll take it!) We did not follow Mia to the playground because I did not want to blow Josie through her thresholds, which she will do if she is following another horse. So we took our SLOW time to get out to the playground. It probably took half an hour. And it was GREAT! I had a calm, confident horse that was okay with things. I didn’t ask for rocket science when we got out to the playground. We just did little things, but I was so happy to have a happy horse! You take the time that it takes, and it is SO worth it. We practiced our Savvy Spotlights in the honeycomb. I did one on line, and one at liberty. We won’t be applying to do one at Madison. As much as I would love to, I realize that the horsenality and relationship that I have at the moment is not conducive to success in that particular venue! Which is okay!

We ended the day by crossing the bridge! Amazing what a calm, learning horse will do for you! There is always a reason for everything. I needed to finally take the time that she needed to be okay with things. We have been talking about putting the relationship first all week, and I finally got it right.

BTW, our morning classroom session had two special visitors—Linda and then Pat Parelli! It was great to hear the stories they had to tell, and hear about all of the fantastic new things coming down the pike. I am so grateful to be alive during this time of amazing horsemanship!

Savvy on—
Molly and Josie